Poll: Bathroom Etiquette

I spent a good 19 minutes over the holiday weekend trying to find a widget for WordPress to allow me to post a poll in the upper right hand corner.  Sadly, it just wasn’t meant to be (if anyone knows better, holla at me!).

So here’s my poll question, and please feel free to comment openly in the comment section:

You are in a public bathroom.  Someone tries to open the door, which you have no doubt locked.  You see the knob turning.  You are terrified for a second, thinking you might have forgotten to lock the door even though you specifically remembered that you locked the door.  The door doesn’t open and you assume the person is waiting outside or at the minimum understands that the door is locked.  But no…

They turn the knob AGAIN–harder, faster, more determined.  You even hear them shoving their shoulder against the door.  Do you say:

“Someone is in here!”


“I am in here!”



  1. HAHAHAHA!!! I usually say “YO!” and drop my newspaper on the floor in case they didn’t hear me. Don’t be afraid to fart loudly either!

  2. or you just shout out loud: “Don’t touch it! … bastards…” … “I’ll open that door for you, but you won’t be happy!”

  3. So I’ve been thinking about this a little since our discussion and I’ve come to some kind of conclusion. When in a place you know (home, a friend’s house, etc.) I would most likely reply with “I’m in here” because 99% of the time it’s going to be someone I know and they will know who “I” am, but in a public place (which is very unlikely with me) where this person who is incredibly determined to get into a locked stall I would reply with “Someone is in here” because they don’t know me and wouldn’t know or care who “I” was. I would also reply with “Someone is in here” if it happened to be one of those moments where I am in a bathroom with a friend who happens to be extremely sick and I am not the one using the facility just there to hold back the hair. Those are my thoughts on the subject.

  4. I understand what you’re getting at here, as far as the issue of self identification. But the last time this situation arose for me, I yelled, “Chill the fuck out!,” and thus avoided the dilemma of having to choose either the first or third person when announcing my presence to an inconsiderate stranger.

  5. I usually stick my foot under the door and tap it a couple times and let that asshole in for a bonafied ass whooping…jk

    Naw, on some serious shit, I usually just say: It’s being occupied…or I’m in here.

    Anotha Time,


  6. I’ve had this happen with someone at my job…..I yelled, “Yo!!!!” and dude eventually got it, but he was determined before hand, so I get where you’re coming from.

  7. Telling them to cool-out and emphasizing it with an expletive like “fuck” is probably the best way to deal with it. My deal in public is that the ruder you are, the less apt someone is to say, respond. People are pussies…”I’m in here asshole”, maybe??


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