Dear Peyton: You Are Kyle Orton’s Bitch

Holy crap!!!

I’d be lying if I said I expected the Bears to walk into the Colts new sold out staudim, on a nationally televised game, with Kyle “Neckhair” Orton under center and rookie running back Matt Forte making his first career start, and completely contain the profilic Colts offense.  The Bears managed to grab a safety, knock Dallas Clark and Joseph Addai out of commission, sack Peyton Manning twice, strip Marvin Harrison and return a fumble for a touchdown, reestablish a running game that was MIA in 2007, and make it impossible for me to fall asleep until 1:30am. 

OH MY GOD!!!

In a game where Devin Hester and Brian Urlacher’s presence and resumes contributed more than their play, where Kyle Orton threw no touchdowns nor an interception, where Bears wideouts were relegating to blocking downfield, the Monsters dropped 29 points on a Colts D that runs the same Cover 2 scheme as Lovie and the boys.  The only difference between this game and the Super Bowl was that this time, the Bears would not allow the Colts running game to punch them in the mouth.  By not surrendering any big plays downfield and neutralizing Addai and Domenic Rhodes, the boys let Peyton Manning throw an array of short passes all night to no real detriment, save for a Reggie Wayne TD early on the third quarter.  Shockingly, the Bears sustained their lead the entire game and shocked the NFL aftering being 9.5 point underdogs going into Sunday night.   

On Defense:

Charles “Peanut” Tillman was lights out once again on the big stage and tomahawked the surehanded Marvin “Guns Blazing” Harrison, my fellow Roman Catholic alum (what up!).  Alex “Big MItts” Brown proved again why he’s one of the most underrated defensive lineman in the game.  Lance Briggs was around the ball all night and scored the backbreaking TD.  Wale Ogunleye got pressure and forced the safety on Addai.  Mike Brown managed to keep his fragile body intact for at least one week.

On Offense:

Matt Forte–what else can I say?  No one expected the kid to blow the doors open this quickly.  F’ a Cedric Benson!  His cutbacks and counters reminded me alot of Thomas Jones, the last time the Bears had a competent running game.  Greg Olsen and Dez Clark snagged big passes downfield as always.  The offensive line was OK and the receivers barely registered a blip, but Kyle Orton was the cracker-ass cracka version of David Garrard.  No missteps, no zany plays, no big deal.  As vanilla as he is, Orton’s career record is now 13-6.  Steve Young said he expected Orton to have a better year and I almost laughed out loud.  A “better year” for Orton meant more than 12 TD’s and less than 15 INT’s, and now that doesn’t seem so ludicrous.  It seems like the boys may repeat their formula from ’05-’06 and fight for the division barring injuries. 

I’m just super geeked right now!  BEAR DOWN CHICAGO BEARS!

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