Dear Jon Kitna: You Are Kyle Orton’s Bitch

This is becoming too easy.

Detroit is making the best hip hop on the planet right now, so let’s at least give them respect for that.  But they play football like Bizarre from D12.  Your first place Chicago Bears completely executed the “A Millen A Millen”-less Detroit Lions, Spanish Inquisition style.  I had to work, so I missed the game, but two touchdowns from Matt Forte, a 300+ yd effort and 125 QB Rating from Kyle Orton, and a smothering beatdown from the defense is enough for me to just summarize it briefly:  Bears good, Lions bad. 

The next two weeks find the Bears playing at Atlanta and in Chicago against the stinking Vikings before hitting the bye on Week 8.  First place looks pretty secure, with the Packers getting smacked around like they stepped to Maino, the Vikings seriously starting Gus Ferrotte at QB (no seriously, they’re not kidding, and Tavaris Jackson has all his limbs intact), and the Lions doing their damndest to become the gridiron version of the New York Knicks.  The NFC North is wide open, like “an envelope with money in it”–La the Darkman.


1 Comment

  1. i enjoy the “how many hip-hop references can i cram into a sports post” thing you have going on here.

    so much less grating than when sportscenter does it.

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